If it feels like you need a translator to talk with your teenager, you’re not alone. Between all the shook’s, lit’s, fire’s, and fam’s I’ve overheard my own teen and her friends saying lately — I’m lost too. 

Every generation has its own particular lingo that adults aren’t really supposed to understand. Think about how many words have meant “great,” throughout the years like aces, swell, keen, groovy, rad, bad. Nowadays, it’s “lit” or “fire.” For the most part, teens use slang as a way to create their own identity, fit into specific social groups, and express independence.

“Language is a lot like fashion,” says Mary Kohn, an associate professor of English at Kansas State University who studies the intersection of language and culture. “Teens coin words and slang partly because using their parent’s jargon would be a lot like wearing mom’s jeans. They would come across as old-fashioned and out of touch.”

Sometimes teens use coded language to keep their parents in the dark too, but not as much as you might think. Just last year, we wrote about sneaky texting acronyms teens used to hide communication from adults such as 53X for “sex,” or CD9 for “code 9, parents around.” Several teens told that doesn’t happen much anymore, because even if parents still routinely monitor text messages, teens can now use disappearing Snapchat messages and “Finsta” (fake Instagram) accounts without parents stumbling upon it.

“It’s more of a strategy game now. I think parents used to go through their kids’ text messages, so they would use slang, emoji or abbreviations more” says 17-year old Lauren Trujillo of Oakland. “But now I don’t think they even have to worry about that. They just go over to a different app and can communicate freely.” Trujillo and several other teens also say they’re communicating more with gif’s and meme’s now than ever before. (If you don’t know what those are, this article might fill you in.)

So why do they do it? If you ask a dozen teens, you’ll get a dozen different answers, but one overarching theme is that teens, like all of us, want to be unique.

“I just talk with a lot of my friends in this weird language my parents don’t understand, not because I don’t want them to understand it, but because we just think it’s kind of weird and funny and ironic,” Trujillo says. 20-year old UCLA student Mahala Herron-Rutland adds, “it’s a free speech sort of thing.”

“It boils down to identity,” University of Michigan Associate Professor Scott Campbell says over the phone. Campbell’s work focuses on the impact of mobile communication and social networking on media and society. “It’s a way of marking insiders from outsiders, and certainly if you’re a grown-up, you’re an outsider.”

Tell me about it. Every time I try to slide a trendy word into a sentence, my 17-year old daughter begs me not to be so “cringey,” and calls my attempts at being hip — totally “extra.”

Still, teens aren’t shy about their slang, and even if they’re keeping their most sensitive conversations out of reach from prying parental eyes and ears, you’re still likely to come across a lot of confusing words used in everyday conversation — including in the latest episodes of your favorite TV shows. Just this past week, I heard “hundo p,” “af,” and “lit,” and “slide down in the dm’s” used on Younger, and a half dozen more similar expressions on The Bold Type. (See definitions below.)

To make it all even more confusing, many of the same words have different meanings, depending on the context. Take the word “addy” for example:

“Addy is slang for Adderall,” my 20-year old neighbor Morgan Austin tells me. Adderall is a prescription drug for ADHD but also abused as a popular recreational drug among teens. Herron-Rutland agrees, “yeah, parents if you see that, it’s a red flag. It’s definitely about drugs.” “Wait, I used “addy” for address,” says 15-year old high school sophomore Dylan DeMarco. Sigh.

In the spirit of being in the know, rather than trying to use these words ourselves, here’s a cheat sheet of the latest teen slang and acronyms. *Please note, many of the terms have origins in black culture and the use of some might be considered appropriation. More on that at the end of this column.

Beef = a disagreement or hostility

BRB = be right back

Bruh = another way of saying “bro” or “brother”

Canceled = done, deleted, finished, blocked on social media

Clout Chaser = someone who tries to latch on to other, more popular people

Clout Demon = a wannabe

Cringey = awkward, uncomfortable, cringe-worthy

Curve = reject someone’s advances

Dead Ass = To be completely and honestly serious

Dead = overwhelmed or exhausted

Dime = rating of attractiveness, 10/10

Down in the DM = direct messaging someone privately, usually to hook up

Drip, Drippin = flashy, ostentatious

Extra = over-the-top

F2F = face to face, meeting in person

Fam = the friends you are closest with

Finna = going to/about to, short for “fixing to”

Finsta = a fake Instagram account

Fleeky = amazing or great

Glow-Up = an incredible transformation

Goals = a lifestyle to strive for

GOAT = greatest of all time, mainly used in sports

Gucci = good, cool

High-key = a lot, wanting everyone to know something

Hit a lick = to steal something

Hundo P = 100 percent, confirming something

It’s lit = cool, awesome, great

I’m weak = something so funny it made you weak

Juice = credibility, respect, can also mean booze or drugs

Juul = a popular brand of vaporizer used by teens

Kickback = a casual get together

KMS/KYS = kill myself, kill yourself, used sarcastically

Lean = an intoxicating drink made using soda and cough syrup

Meme = a joke or reference to something

OP = out of pocket, used when something is extreme or offensive

Pods = disposable cartridge for a nicotine vaporizer

Ratchet = loud, obnoxious, trashy

Saucy = feisty or sassy

Savage = wild or harsh

Shade = trash talk

Shook = shocked, upset

Sips tea = minding your own business

Smash = to hook up, have sex

Squad = your closest group of friends

Stan = have an intense fandom for a particular object, such as a singer, athlete, or company

Straight fire = popular, trendy, or awesome

Sus = short for suspect, when something is suspicious or sketchy

TBH = to be honest

Tea = gossip

Thicc = voluptuous, curvy body (usually a compliment)

Thirsty = wants attention, or usually from a specific person

Throw shade = talking badly about a person or thing

Tweaking = high, usually on amphetamines

V = very

Wig = when something crazy or unexpected (good) happens

Woke = enlightened about social issues